Iran: Pay Attention

Posted in World Events with tags on Wednesday, June 24, 2009 by theclimaxan

What’s happening in Iran as we speak is an amazing/tragic/ and inspiring thing to watch. Watching a society stand up for what they believe in, watching them fight for it, bleed for it, and die for it is profound. Anyone who reads this I implore you to pay attention to what’s happening if you aren’t already. Not just because the outcome of this situation will have a major effect on US policy in the region, but also to witness the courage and bravery it takes to stand up against true oppression. There has been nothing on this scale since Tiananmen Square. I just hope they don’t have similar outcomes.

Review: Transformers 2

Posted in Movie Reviews with tags , , , , on Wednesday, June 24, 2009 by theclimaxan
Now matter how hard he tries. Optimus cant save this one

Now matter how hard he tries. Optimus can't save this one

What the hell did I just watch. Seriously. I know Michael Bay is only good at blowing things up and his movies aren’t meant to be high art, but hell TF2 is an absolute mess. The way I described the level of suckness to a friend of mine earlier today went a little like this. Take everything that was lame about the first Transformers movie and multiply that by 10, then subtract everything that was cool about the first movie and divide that by 5. What you get is an equation of shitiness in it’s purest form.

The redeeming factor of the first TF were the action sequences, and in the sequel there are two very solid action sequences. The rest of the action is either obscured by objects in the Transformers environment or edited so badly you can’t tell what the hell is going on. I love fighting robots (who doesn’t) but there were few occasions where you can actually make out what the hell is happening outside a blur of metal and explosion flying past your face in slow-mo.

One of the worst things about the first film was Michael Bay’s terrible attempts at humor. Which naturally meant it had to be amped up to the tenth degree for TF2. These are cringe-worthy attempts at humor, with the biggest insults to your intelligence coming in the form of the a duo called the “twins”. I prefer to call them “Car Car Binks”. You will hate them that much. I miss the Michael Bay humor of the past, you know the “Mike Lowwwwww-Ry” or “Carla was the prom queen”. Now Bay has resorted to humping robots and really bad stereotypes. On top of it just being plain unfunny its also very badly timed humor, popping in just when you think shits about to get real. You’ll be sitting there like “Oh wow, Optimus Prime is awesome” then cut to Jon Tuturro saying “I’m under the enemies scrotum” as he looks up at a set of balls on a Decepticon. Your eyes will roll so far back in your head you won’t be able to see the movie screen. Which in the case of Transformers 2 might actually be a blessing in disguise.

Save yourself. Wait till this one comes on TNT.

2/10

Review: UP

Posted in Movie Reviews with tags , , , , , on Wednesday, June 3, 2009 by theclimaxan

UP is not a kid’s movie. It’s a serious tale of  love, loss, missed opportunities, adventure, and rediscovery. Kids will be wowed by the bright colors, the dogs, Kevin and of course a floating house, but the deeper storylines of death, broken families and the plight of the elederly will surely go right over every rugrats head. Pixar has mastered this art,  and UP is yet another gem in their now priceless storytelling crown.

The first 20 minutes of UP tell the gripping life story of Carl and Elle, childhood sweethearts who truly grew old together. They always had dreams of adventure but life got in the way as years passed until eventually it was too late to chase them. Pixar portray’s this sequence in a montauge that will make the hardest man produce a tear and sets the table for a tale that proves you are never to old to come of age. Anyone who has ever been close to a grandparent will immediately connect with UP.

Despite the serious undertones, UP still brings the funny thanks to the animal companions. Most importantly Kevin (the bird) and Doug (the talking dog). Their prescene combines Pixar’s clever comedy timing with cuteness to trick the kids. Listen closely to some of the things the dogs say to one another off screen. Some very classic stuff.

Overall, UP ranks right up their with my Pixar favorites (Wall.E, Nemo, Toy Story). It’s got emotion and smarts which is more than most movies can even fake these days. Go see it. Soon.

10/10

E3: Nintendo announces New. Super Mario Brothers Wii. Fanboy heads explode worldwide.

Posted in Gaming with tags , , , , on Tuesday, June 2, 2009 by theclimaxan

Nintendo made me a very happy man today. I’ve been pining for a straight up 2D Mario game since the mid 90’s. I don’t enjoy handhelds so a new console based Mario Bros. has been a pipe dream for me for a very, very long time. That all changed this morning when Nintendo unveiled the game of my dreams. It’s not the most graphically wowing game but the gamelplay looks solid and the nostalgia factor is high enough to raise the terror alert to code “holy shit”. My only issue was how un-excited Nintendo reps were during the unveiling. There needed to be explosions, tears of joy and sacrifices. Instead there were monotone descriptions and a demonstration made by people who had obviously never played a video game before. Oh well, I got my wish. Check the trailer.

Nintendo also rolled out the first true 3D Mario sequel in Mario Galaxy 2. The game looks amazing. I just need to hurry up and beat Galaxy so I can get fully hyped.

E3: Microsoft Project Natal

Posted in Gaming with tags , , , , , , , on Monday, June 1, 2009 by theclimaxan

Microsoft pretty much knocked the ball out of the park today. They announced huge exclusives (Splinter Cell, Metal Gear, Forza 3, Alan Wake, Halo ODST and Reach) but there biggest announcement came in the form of some pretty advanced technology. It was no shocker that both Sony and Microsoft would try and outdo the Wii, but what M$ presented today went way beyond my expectations. A waggle remote this is not. 

Dubbed Project Natal. This technology utilizes voice recognition, 1 to 1 motion sensing capabilities and visual scanning. No remote/controller is needed as the combination of technologies makes you the controller. At first Microsoft showed off multiple lame uses of Natal such as steering a car and changing a tire. Sure it was cool to see the Xbox controlled entirely with one’s hands and voice, but what worries me is that it would get old quick (just like with the Wii at times). My fears were quickly squashed as Peter Moleyneux took the stage (he helped develop Spore, Fable I and II). What happened next is one the freakiest/most innovative uses of video game technology I’ve ever witnessed. The future is now folks. Prepare to fight the machines or cry… because well, just watch. It’s amazing.

E3: Halo ODST and Halo: Reach

Posted in Gaming with tags , , , , on Monday, June 1, 2009 by theclimaxan

I’m a huge Halo fan. As such, I’ve been looking forward to new details on Halo ODST. What I didn’t expect was how soon I would actually be able to play the game (September 22,2009) and all the goodies will be included. ODST has an additional 5 hours of campaign mode, an additional “horde” like mode titled Firefight, and a beta key for the prequel to Combat Evolved, titled Halo: Reach. I had been hearing rumors of the next Halo over the weekend but in my mind I never expected an announcement to actually happen and if it did I surelywasn’t expecting Bungie be its developer.  So it’s safe to say when Bungie reveal that it had been a busy little bee I was f’n pumped. 

The details of reach are still pretty scare. We don’t even know if it’s an FPS. We do know that beta keys are going out with every copy of ODST so Reach must be very far into development.  Below is the first artwork for Halo: Reach. I’ll put up the trailers a little bit later. Until then check out the link: http://www.bungie.net/projects/odst/

E3 Begins!

Posted in Gaming with tags , , , , , , , , , on Monday, June 1, 2009 by theclimaxan

Today at 1:25 EST the Electronics Entertainment Expo kicks off in LA. Every year (minus the last two years) E3 has proven to be Christmas, Your Birthday, and New Years Eve all wrapped into one super fantastic week of gaming goodness. The hype swirling around this years event has been ridiculous as Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo are all “supposed” to blow our faces off. I’ll be updating the site with conference recaps and any cool artwork/video that comes out. Stay Tuned.